What Not To Say To A Pregnant Woman

News flash: Just because a belly is large-and-in-charge doesn’t give an excuse to turn manners off.

Now that I’m thisclose to my due date, I’m in that zone where it seems every conversation I’m in revolves around the belly. Which is so sweet and welcomed, but I’ve got to be honest, sometimes the things people say is baffling! While I know it’s all good-natured, I can’t help but internally sigh at some of the soundbites that roll off tongues. With that in mind, I thought it’d be helpful for me to put together a little list of what not to say to a pregnant woman!

What Not To Say To A Pregnant Woman

Are you sure there’s not twins in there?!

Yup, positive, but thanks for calling me abnormally huge.

Oh wow, you’re HUGE!

As if I didn’t feel huge enough, you stating the obvious really made it official. And hey, by the way, how would you feel if I said that back?

It’s probably just your hormones.

Gee thanks for completely de-valuating my feelings and minimizing my thoughts. Note for the future that I WILL TURN INTO A TERROR GREMLIN IF YOU SAY IT AGAIN. Go ahead and call that hormones. 😉

Your bump looks so much smaller than normal!

I haven’t personally had this said but I’ve heard it said and my jaw nearly dropped. Every woman’s body is different, and their bumps are no different. As if they’re not worried about a million things already, insinuating that their body (and thus, baby) isn’t big enough is plain rude.

I like <Insert name here> better.

Buuuut what if I like a different one better?! Please only give your opinion if it’s asked. (By the way, I’ve totally asked this and genuinely wanted to hear a response! But when it’s offered up without me asking, it’s rude.)

Why would you want to deliver that way?!

A common response I get when I note that I’d like to try and deliver all naturally this time around. You do know every mother in history before recent years delivered naturally, right? And regardless, you also know that I don’t owe you an explanation or validation for my preferences, right? Just checking.

<< Insert horror story about your delivery/a delivery you know of here >>

I get it. Things go wrong. It’s scary. It’s painful. We can’t plan for it and as a result people do crazy things like have babies in cars because their labor ended up being 1 hour long. (Actual story I heard recently that sent me into a tailspin of worry about Doug needing to deliver the baby in the car.) Maybe save the horror stories for after I’ve delivered and can laugh about it all with you instead of being wide-eyed and panicked, okay?

Can I touch your belly?

I personally don’t mind at ALL when people touch my belly, but I’m also a super open person who also happens to be a “hugger.” (Ha – you know what I mean, right? I’m totally one of those, “Can we hug? I’m a hugger!” people.) BUT many people are not this way and it’s important to be respectful of their personal space. A lot of women really don’t like when people touch their bellies. Asking is nice, but then you also put them in the position of saying “No” if they’re uncomfortable, which is also uncomfortable. So maybe just don’t do it at all unless it’s offered?

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Wondering what to say instead? Ask how they’re feeling, if they’re excited, what all they’re doing to prepare. Tell them they look great, and give them a pat on the back for all they’re physically going through. Ask them their plans for delivery, and perhaps even how you can be helpful over the newborn days. Be complimentary, open, and thoughtful.

Ladies – What else should be added to this list of things not to say?! Do share in the comments below!

PS – The Best Compliment You Can Give To A Pregnant Woman + 8 Hacks For Stylish Maternity Outfits