Where I Was In 2010 + Where I Want To Be In 2030

A Decade in Review

I remember 2010 well.

A decade in review is always fun, no? I was 24, just moved to Chicago, and broke. I’d just signed up for a massive amount of student loan debt for graduate school, a task I dedicated to nights and weekends while simultaneously working full time to pay rent. My best friend and I moved in together to split costs, along with two girls we met the day we signed the lease agreement. Despite 4 years of being together, Doug and I were still very much figuring ourselves and each other out. (When you start dating at 19 that’s natural, you see.) It was my first time living in a big city; it took me 2 hours to get home from work the first day because I kept taking the wrong “el” line and getting lost.

When I think back on that time, young & naive sums things up well. I was in that phase of life where you’re old enough to expect things of yourself, but young enough to still take your time with it all. Fresh out of college, but entering into…more college. To which I really didn’t have a clue what I’d do with my degree once I graduated. I had no idea where I was headed next, and if I’m being honest, emotionally I think I was still in my late teens.

I certainly wasn’t thinking about the year 2020 and all that it would hold. A decade sounded so far away. Intangible.

But all of a sudden, 2020 is here.

It’s like I snapped my fingers and all of a sudden I’m 33. Time has flown, and I was certainly having fun, but really…did it have to go by that fast?! I remember some days like they were yesterday, and yet they were years ago. Memories clouded by a haze through which I often need to ask things like, “Wait what year was that?” or, “Who was there for that hysterical moment when…” It’s like those moments happened, but not really at all.

I could take you through the jobs, good and bad times, growth periods, moves, and seasons, but today’s reflection is beyond that. It’s bigger than that. Or is it smaller?

You see, as I look back on my 2010s with a 20/20 hindsight vision (That works SO WELL with the year 2020, by the way), one key thing sticks out.

Most of the big, pivotal life changes and times were actually made up of small, every day moments.

Graduating with my M.A. was actually hundreds of long, often boring, hours studying late night. Getting my first ad agency job can be traced to taking an acquaintance to coffee and asking him to make an email intro to the agency team. Our wedding day was a culmination of lots of little moments and decisions, both on the actual big day but also in our relationship. Heck, having children was the result of every day moments — for example, a kiss welcoming Doug home turned into, well, Grace. (Ha! Sorry, TMI, but it’s true and it’s life, so zero shame!)

The point is that big things can happen in a decade. Life altering things that take your path far beyond what you may have predicated or anticipated. Things like job changes, and moves, and marriage, and children. But what I’ve learned through the passage of time is that most of those big things are in actuality little moments that ladder up to big results.

And, so, the true takeaway is this:

Little moments matter.

Each and every one of them. The every day interactions. The small decisions. They all matter, they all have an impact, and they all equate to something bigger in this thing called life.

The decision to say yes to an opportunity can affect the trajectory of your entire career. How you talk to your spouse on the daily can affect the health of your relationship. Responding to that text, smiling at a stranger, or inviting a friend to dinner who you haven’t seen in a while affects how you make someone feel. Turning off the TV and playing with your kids can affect how they learn and grow that day.

When it comes down to it, life is a summation of countless little moments that all matter. When I think about the next decade and all that I want from it, that’s the biggest thing that sticks out in my mind.

Here’s where I want to be in 2030.

Similar to my stance in 2010 while thinking of 2020, it’s nearly impossible to comprehend or even guess the many changes life will bring over the next 10 years. To set a prescriptive stance on 2030 feels too big and completely intangible for me to do right now.

Will we be in our same house? How many kids will we have? Will I still be in the same career path? Will Doug? What friends will I have stayed in touch with? What trips will we have taken? Will I – our family – be fortunate to have the greatest gift of health?

Here’s what I do know.

I want to make the little moments count, every day, of the next 10 years and beyond. I know big things will happen, for better and for worse. My greatest hope is that, in all those moments, I show up in a way that is positive. That I make them all count, simply by respecting and acknowledging their actual bigness.

I have so many goals and aspirations and hopes for the next decade, but when I really think about it, acknowledging the bigness in the small is probably the thing that connects them all. If I am able to do that, not matter the situation, I think the path to 2030 will bring great things.

And alright, fine. Spending every summer exploring a new travel destination with our family wouldn’t hurt, either. One can dream right? Putting this out there in the universe to manifest. 😉

Cheers to the next decade, my friends. May it be filled with joy from the big to small. xx

PS – If you like these types of life reflections, be sure to check out these posts! In my next 30 years + How going with the flow leads to happiness + A powerful perspective on change + A message for my daughters on International Women’s Day